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Mental rehearsal allows you to think small thoughts to develop new skills and habits - without moving a muscle. Whatever your goal, this is a terrific way to ease into your program for change. Here's how:

1. Isolate a task either that you are afraid to do or that makes you uncomfortable. Try to give yourself at least a month before you actually have to perform this activity.
2. Decide how many seconds you're willing to devote to mental rehearsal. Make sure you allot seconds, not minutes or hours; the time commitment should be so low that you can easily fulfill its requirements every single day. Repetition is important.
3. When you are ready to practice mental rehearsal , sit or lie down in a quiet, comfortable spot and close your eyes
4. Imagine you are in that difficult or uncomfortable situation and looking through your own eyes around you. What do you see? What is the setting? Who's there? What do they look like? See the expressions on their faces, the clothes they are wearing, their posture.
5. Now expand your imagination to the rest of your senses. What are the sounds and smells and flavors and textures around you?
6. Without moving an actual muscle, imagine that you are performing the task. What are the words you use? What does your voice sound like and how does it resonate through your body? What are your physical gestures?

7. Imagine a positive response to your activity. If you are mind sculpting for public speaking, for example, see the audience leaning forward in their seats, looking responsive and interested. Hear the scratch of pencil on paper as some particularly enthusiastic people take notes.

8. When your allotted time for mental rehearsal has become habitual and even fun, you may find that you are automatically performing the formerly difficult activity with enthusiasm. But if you're not ready for the real thing, that's perfectly okay. Never force the process of small steps; it works only if you let change happen in a comfortable and easy manner. You may instead choose to increase the time you spend on mental rehearsal—but once again, you should increase slowly, perhaps by just thirty seconds. You should increase the length and pace only when the previous stage of mental rehearsal has become effortless. If you start making excuses for not practicing mental rehearsal, or if you find yourself forgetting to do it, then you need to cut back on the amount of time.

9. Once you feel comfortable using mental rehearsal for this task (and it may take days or weeks or even longer), imagine a worst-case scenario and how you would respond effectively to it. A public speaker might feel nervous sweat run down his face as he sees the audience members looking bored and hears them whispering among themselves. He would then imagine how he would like to speak, gesture, and feel in that situation.

10. When you feel ready to take on the actual task, try out some small steps at first. To continue the public speak­ing example, consider giving your talk out loud but to an empty room or to an audience of one sympathetic person.

The most important thing is to ask yourself: "What is a tiny step I could make to achieve my goal." Let the question stew for a few days or weeks. When you have an answer, you can use mind rehearsal to imagine yourself taking that step.

For instance, if you'd like to repair a ruptured personal relationship, first think of one thing the other person does to push your buttons, leading you to overreact or avoid that person. Now picture that person performing the irritating behavior and imagine yourself responding in a manner you'd find ideal.

How would your body feel? Would it cool down instead of heating up? What would you like to say and in which tone of voice? What posture would you like to assume?

Many of us would like help learning to relax. Choose a recurring scenario that frequently causes you to become irritated or impatient. Then imagine yourself in that situation, feeling a sense of internal poise and demonstrating good grace toward others. If you're trying to improve your response to heavy traffic, imagine yourself in the car, your muscles remaining relaxed, your breathing deep and even, and your body cool as the drivers around you honk their horns and behave aggressively. Imagine yourself feeling kindness toward the other drivers - and maybe feel yourself waving to let one of them into your lane!